We've all heard it, and from those who haven't "voiced" it, we have felt it from them.
"Why don't you just have one of your own?"
"Why would you want to take this on and risk disrupting your perfect family?"
"Why would you want a child that is not biologically your own?"
I have concluded that most ( if not all!) people around me have thought this way at some point or another. Because of this, I have been giving a great deal of thought to who adopts. If everyone felt this way, who would be there to scoop these orphans up and give them a loving family? Then it dawned on me - if many people did not struggle with infertility, most adopted children would never have been adopted. I read a report that said 94% of adoptive parents have struggled with infertility!
I have been surrounded by many articles, stories and discussions of infertility lately... and I do give it a lot of thought. What a terrible thing to have to experience... the pain, the frustration and the grief. I don't know what you all have gone through. I can try to imagine - but the truth is I won't even come close to knowing. However, I feel for you deeply and I salute you. For if it weren't for you, many of the orphaned children in the world would have never known the warmth of a loving home! You were born with a purpose... and adoption ended up being the best choice for you! Not second - but best! I fully believe that more people would adopt if they had the knowledge of knowing what a wonderful gift adoption is. But you were forced into researching alternatives - you were forced to uncover that secret. You were blessed with your infertility... because without it, you would not have been blessed with your children, nor would they have been blessed with you! Thank you for struggling through these issues and coming out of it as adoption warriors!