Adoptive parents ROCK. Period.

In the light of all the recent bad publicity surrounding international adoption, due to a select few news stories... I'd like to take a moment, outside all of the accusations and judgements painted on international adoptions, to bring some positivity and light to the other 99%. Unfortunately, an extreme few sometimes tends to taint the whole group, when in fact, most adoptive parents are simply amazing! 

 

No, this is not about tooting my own horn. Yes, I happen to fit the title of adoptive parent... but this post is really a heart felt message for those who came before me... (with out you, there would not have been an 'adoptive me') and those who continue to knock my socks off with your desire and passion, and the work you do for the orphans of the world!! 

 

It makes me sad to see such negativity around such a beautiful thing and the fall out landing on the amazing folks known as adoptive parents. It's nonsense and needs to stop, cause quite frankly, you have earned your badge of honor.

 

 

The world needs to understand who adoptive parents are, and what you have gone through to become one.

 

You had the courage to do what many can't even imagine. You went out on that ledge and you leaped. To follow your hearts whim, when your head gave you 100 reasons not to.

 

You slaved over applications, biographies, ordered original copies of everything from your birth certificates (the long form!), to your last bank statement... and copied them all in triplicate. Thousands of pages later, many late nights and paper cuts to show for it.

 

You prayed. You fretted. Wrung your hands dry, wondering how you would ever come up with the money. You fundraised, worked weekends, had garage sales, collected bottles, counted your pennies, accessed your lines of credit and got an adoption loan.

 

You spent many sleepless nights, and crying sessions in the shower, wondering and worrying what type of trauma your baby had gone through or was currently going through, and you didn't even know their name.

 

You purchased and read every book published on adoption, attachment and trauma. You watched videos and documentaries. You know every adoption blog out there and the authors by their 'real' first names.

You learned how to use Yahoo and Google groups, and even opened up a Facebook account to better connect you to the adoption community.

 

You endured hours and hours of interviews by a social worker whom asked you personal questions like, "Are you satisfied with your sexual relationship?".

 

You cleaned your closets, top of your cupboards and scrubbed walls, to only have the social worker not even look there.

 

You drove hours to be biometrically fingerprinted to prove you are not a criminal, only to find out that you will always have to say, 'yes' (followed by an explanation - cause you now sound like a criminal!) every time the border officer asks you if you have been fingerprinted.

 

You had scans, needles and fingers prodded in personal places to prove your health.

 

You took time off work, flew or drove many miles to attend your AEP. Otherwise known as the Adoption Education Program.

 

You attended seminars about the FASD child and Attachment Parenting.

 

You decorated the baby room, collected little shoes, rain coats and hats, without the slightest clue of when they would ever be able to be put to use.

 

You stressed and worried... made repeated emails and phone calls to your agency, hoping they would submit documents on time.

 

You chased your dossier around the world via Fedex tracking like a child tracks Santa on Christmas Eve on NORAD.

 

You waited and waited and waited and waited and waited. For many of you, it was an Elephant's gestation. You learned that waiting, can be the most difficult thing to do.

 

You took up learning the birth language of your soon to be child. You started eating and learning how to make foods you couldn't even pronounce.

 

Champagne and cigars... you cried tears of joy and shouted off the mountain tops when you FINALLY got your referral.

You instantly fell in love with a child on a piece of a paper.

You stalked blogs, websites and facebook pages, trying to get a small glimpse of him/her.

 

You flew thousands of miles, across the world to meet your new child. Some of you flew several times, over a long duration of time, as the legal side of the adoption was processed.

 

Some of you uprooted your lives and moved to foreign countries to fulfill residency. You put your jobs on hold, left friends, family and pets behind to be with your little one.

 

You endured the scrutiny and questioning yet again, from a few more different departments, this time in the birth country of your child. You were asked questions like, "Is your relationship Monogamous?" and "Have you ever had more than one wife?".

 

You ran all over a foreign city, taxi hopping one place to another as you chased down documents. You pleaded with government officials and cried at the counter of the Visa issuing embassy.

 

You wiped runny noses, medicated scalp fungus, and tackled ring worm.. several times as it made it's way through your family. You scooped poop into little viles... and we all know how great parasite poo smells!

 

You learned how to braid and care for skin and hair that is so completely different from yours. You learned why night caps are so important and the wonders of coconut oil.

 

And some of you went beyond...

 

Some of you did all this on your own as a single parent.

 

Some of you intentionally made the decision to adopt the 'unadoptable'.

The child with HIV. The child with FASD. The child with Down Syndrome. The child with cleft palate. The child with conditions and birth defects that I didn't even know existed. Children that were diagnosed with death sentences and left to die. Children with such abusive, traumatic pasts that they don't even know how to love. Who does that?!

 

YOU DID THAT!

You are angels in disguise, on this earthly planet, you are.

 

You did this all why?

 

I'm sorry... but put your humble hat away. It's more than doing it to become a parent.

Sure, for some of you that is where is your story started... but then the story changed you.

 

The sacrifices. The dedication. The commitment. 

 

 You did it to save the life of  a child. You did it to give a child a family. You did it to give a child what they deserve - a better life. You did it, because if you didn't - who would? You did it out of love and compassion and you certainly wouldn't have changed a thing!

 

It wasn't easy... hell, it was probably the most difficult thing you have ever done. But it was worth it!

 

So the next time you feel like your put in a position to defend your decision to adopt continents away, a child that doesn't look like you or is considered 'special needs'; or when you feel assaulted by misjudgements, criticism and blanket statements as the negativity around international adoption escalates...

 

Remember how many people (like me!) you have inspired. How appreciated and respected you are. Remember how many lives you have changed as a result of your journey, as the effects 'ripple' on.

 

Sure, your just the same as anyone else... but with a little 'sprinkle' of amazing.

 At least give yourself that.

 

 

 

I truly believe the responsibility of the orphan lies with us all. Some of us act... and others play a supportive role. But none of it would happen with out you... the adoptive parent.

 

I want to thank you.

 

Thank you for your bravery and commitment. The fight that you fight every day... to parent children from tough places and the fight you fought to get them there.

 

Thank you.

 

Thank you for following the pain in your heart, having enough faith to let it lead you, and enough courage to follow it through.

 

You are all salt of the earth people - and I'm proud to say I know you.

 

Thank you. 

The world next door. Part I

I realize I really need to start posting about our every day life here. We now consider it 'just life'... but it really should be documented because it is so far from what our 'norm' is, right down to the smallest of details.

Yesterday, we took a visit to a beautiful orphanage and the slum it resides in.

The slum is Huruma. We were told it is Nairobi's second largest slum, next to Kibera. George Hussein Onyango Obama, Barack Obama's half-brother actually resides in Huruma.

Much of Huruma consists of tin/rubbish houses that have no electricity, running water or sewer connections. In 2010, an innovative slum upgrading project was completed, providing improved block wall houses to over 200 homes. All with running water, sewage, electricity and drainage. Including renovated toilet blocks. In the old part, there is one toilet per 1000 people! Can you imagine what that would be like? I certainly do not want to!

Our drive in to the orphanage gave us an introduction to the slum. Right outside the gates of this little oasis, otherwise known as Missionaries of Charity, we saw the following.

To the right of the gate.

To the left of the gate - women waiting for any type of handouts from the other side of the gate.

Once inside, we discovered beautiful rose gardens, play areas, grass, school rooms, sleeping quarters, rehabilitation areas, and work areas.

Nuns run this orphanage. The lovely young nun who gave us our tour was Canadian and so very sweet.

The first thing I noted was how well dressed the children were. There were triplets there and they were dressed identical! The clothes were clean, fit well and were gender appropriate.

The youngest school class.

From the school area, we went to visit the baby area.

Very clean. All the bedding was exactly the same and the cribs were adorned with clean, good condition toys. You can see the walkers in the back ground. They did not have any jolly jumpers though, so I donated one of the ones we had recieved for a donation. They were very happy to recieve it. Thank you to the donors!

Every child had a Miraculous Medallion tied around their wrist.

From there we were shown the newborn room.

All babies were snuggly sound asleep and content. :)

Newborn twins... so tiny!!

From there, we were taken to the area where they house women who are mentally challenged or have severe disabilities. Some were conditions from birth, while others were from substance abuse. (long term glue huffing.) Understandably, this area was full and they did not have any more room to accept any more women.

Behind this area, Sister told us is where they keep fatally ill women. AIDS, TB etc. We did not see this area, as I assume it is a bit overwhelming.

After this, we were taken to another building that is home to children with severe disabilities. This was the hard part.

This photo is of the least challenged children. It shows the level of care that these children receive. 

This sweet little girl was the youngest in this ward. Very engaging and happy. She kept saying 'HI!' to us. I assume she has a minor case of holoprosencephaly, but that is mearly a guess.

Beyond this room was a room with a very large bed surrounded by rails. In this bed, were a handful of children who were essentially bed ridden with severe disabilities. I will quote what Muffin recalled in an email to a friend.

"A few days ago we went to an orphanage and we went and saw some cute, tiny babies. After that we went to go see the children in need and with disabilities and

when we first walked in there was a bed with a bunch of children on it but there was one girl named Jaklon who was 16 and she had serious things that she was born with. Her legs were twisted,she had a huge head,twisted arms and fingers.There were also lot of other kids being fed because they could not feed themselves. It was very sad."

This was very eye opening for the children. I don't think it is likely that they have ever seen anything like this even in a photo. Their eyes were as big as saucers, and they instantly clung to us in shock and sadness.

On the outside of the door of this ward, was a beautifully decorated frame casing the photos of all the children and a description of their personalities, likes and dislikes. A little reminder of how loved and well taken care of these once discarded children are. 

I cannot say enough about this orphanage. The children are loved and are raised in a way where they are able to maintain their dignity. How refreshing to see children raised in a home where toys were well looked after, clothing was in good shape, and not once did I smell urine soaked mattresses, blankets etc... or any other unwelcoming odors that are quite common in many of the orphanages we have visited thus far.

However, as Sister said when I was commending her on such a well run facility, 'We do what we can for them. We can give them clean clothing, bedding and a few possessions. It is the least we can do for them when they have lost everything. However, we will never be able to give them enough love.'

Children don't belong in orphanages. They belong in families. 

Bless those who are commited to doing their best for the children who have lost theirs.  

 Moving on... Huruma Slum to be continued....

Change the World for One!

We are off to Kelowna then Vancouver to take my Father in law in for some specialized medical tests.

Let's hope that some word comes back this week about our dossier being seen/approved at the NAC meet!

 I likely won't be posting until later on this week, but I will leave you with a fantastic new video from Ordinary Hero. Enjoy!

 

Diaper Love Kits

Your diaper donations are making their way here from all over Canada! Diapers that once lovingly covered your little one's tooshies, are now being prepared to be sent to babies in need in Kenya. How fantastic is that!?

Here are just a few photos of the diapers you have donated... ;)

Together, we are providing these Mothers and Caregivers a baby essential to improve sanitary and health conditions, but as a bonus - we are also helping to eliminate the waste caused by the disposable diapers and the bags etc used for 'make shift' diapers.

In addition to outfitting an orphanage with diaper love, we would also like to bundle up some diaper love kits for new Mother's in the slums. These diaper love kits will consist of a supply of cloth diapers, handmade cloth wipes, an outfit, and a bar of soap (and perhaps a toy/stuffy) wrapped up in a lovely brand new, large, handmade receiving blanket... hopefully, placed in a wet bucket. (If we can source some out in Kenya.) We are still ironing out details. You all are supplying the diapers, I have a wonderful friend who has offered to make and donate the blankets and wipes... and the rest will soon fall in place!

Our current challenges...

We cannot just hand these kits out and expect that they will know how to use them. They will need instruction and follow up. We are currently on the look out for a diagram instruction pamphlet etc. for cloth diaper use. If you have or know of one, please let me know!

Shipping. I have 1 suitcase set aside to fill with cloth diapers, and I am donating 5% of our adoption bracelet fundraiser sales to cover 3 box shipments. I hope to collect and ship more than that however! In the up coming month or so, we will have a better picture of what shipping costs we can realistically expect.

Many of you have generously asked if you can donate, clothing, toys, blankets, etc... Many of you, I have had to turn down. The reason is the shipping cost. We are limited with shipping funds, so we feel it's best to utilize the space with the priority items. IF - you are interested in filling a box with some love and you can also provide the cost of shipping, I would love to assist you with that. We have a fellow adoptive Mother who is currently living in Nairobi and has graciously offered to accept our shipments at her secure address. She will store the donations for us, until we arrive. Please feel free to contact me at thompsontreehouse at gmail dot com, or find me on facebook - from the link on the right!

Some of you amazing Mom's are starting collections in your communities and shipping them, and others are posting me a diaper or 2 that you have in your stash that don't currently work for you. It all helps... every single diaper is a diaper closer to providing a stash for a baby in need. Thank you all so much for your kind support and generosity... keep those diapers coming in! (And feel free to share this post on your blog or facebook!)

The Fluff is piling in!!

I put out the call for diaper donations and you have responded!! The response is overwhelming! Thank you, each and every one of you. We are getting daily drop offs at all 3 locations, donations by mail, courier and greyhound! Some of you have even started collections in your own communities!!

I may need a train car to get these over there - which is simply fantastic! Keep them coming - It takes about 24 diapers to outfit just one baby!

Babies like this... who, without diapers, stay wet and dirty all day. 

Picture courtesy of His Cherished Ones

A note to the adoptive family's loved ones...(part 1)

There is something weighing heavily on my mind. In fact, it has been weighing on my mind throughout this entire adoption. I know. I've spoken about it before. For every one of those posts that have touched upon it, I assure you there are 10 more that are drafted out on blogger or in my mind.


I read a post last night on a wonderful blogging friend's site. Candice, who is adopting from Russia. As I read her post, I felt like I had written it! And I think I did... almost word for word! I looked for the post today in my draft file and it seems it has disappeared. I likely deleted it upon the realization that I would never be able to 'tone' down the anger and negativity enough to post it.


Since she was able to capture my feeling so eloquently... With her permission, I would like to quote her post.

Three years ago if you had asked me what I thought about the orphan crisis in our world

I would not have had much to say.

Truthfully, I knew nothing about it

and if someone I knew had said to me, "I'm adopting"

I would most likely have said, "that's nice" and thought nothing more about it.

Today however, I have A LOT to say.

(as most of the people who see me on a regular basis can attest to, poor souls.)

Knowledge is a funny thing, isn't it?

The way it will sneak in there and change you.

In just a couple of years, my beliefs and my values have changed so freaking much

that I don't always feel like I am the same person.

I know things now, that I never dreamed could be happening.

And it makes things like paying $5 for a mocha

or worrying about where I buy my clothes seem really REALLY wrong.

It makes the years I spent acting and wanting with every little fiber of my being 

to tread the boards at the Stratford Festival

seem very inconsequential.

Wow.

That was a hard pill to swallow, let me tell you.

And it has made me think of family, and what constitutes a family, very very differently.

The range of reactions I've received to the knowledge that I am adopting have been varied 

to say the least.

I had a mom at the studio hand me a little pattern book and ask me to pick my favourite one

so that she can stitch it up for LB as her gift to us.

(Come on! How awesome is that?)

And then I hear of a mom at the studio who was "completely offended" that I would try and sell 

my fundraiser tshirts at the studio.

Offended?  Wow.  The seems really harsh.

There are plenty of offensive things in the world, 

but raising money to bring an orphan into a family is not something I would necessarily call offensive.

Maybe its just me.

I have received donations from people I barely know

and then had a co worker at the lodge say to me, 

"I don't understand why you'd be fundraising.  Shouldn't they make sure you have enough money 

to adopt before you start the process?"

(that was a fun one to respond to.  Sheesh)

I had an 8 yr old student hand me a wrinkled little envelope with $2.86 in it to 

"help bring home my baby"

(Melt my heart)

and I have family that have never even bothered to ask how the process is going.

And I get it, or rather, I am trying to get it.

I understand that my priorities may not be your priorities

and that what I see as a ridiculous expense, you see as a necessity.

And vice versa.

I question your desire to own an expensive car 

and you question my desire to spend thousands of dollars to bring a child over from Russia 

when I could 'just make one myself'.

Where am I going with all of this mumbo jumbo?

Not really sure.

Truthfully, I don't think I even have a point.

(Isn't that gloriously anti-climactic?)

I believe she does in fact have a point. Perhaps several of them. Let me elaborate on one.

People who are adopting have experienced an 'awakening'. The plight of the orphan has been placed into our hearts. When you have this knowledge, you can no longer turn a blind eye to the suffering of millions of children around the world. We become dedicated and passionately driven to change the situation, even if for just one child. I cannot explain enough how this consumes our every waken moment. 

Please humor me for a moment while I try to explain to you how this feels. 

I recall the 'aha' moment when I first opened my eyes to the orphan crisis. It was when I acknowledged that these children... the ones orphaned, abandoned, struggling to stay alive, could very easily have been my own children. We are lucky to be born in the Western world, but the tables very easily could have been turned. These are children. Children, just as precious as yours or mine. 

I cannot fathom the thought that my 9 year old would ever feel hunger so deeply that she sells her young, innocent 9 yr old body for a piece of stale bread. 

It makes me sick to think of my son going to bed not just hungry, but scared and alone with no one to tuck him in at night and assure him that everything will be okay. 

Just step into our world for a moment.

 Imagine what it would feel like for me to take your child away for a couple years. Place them on the streets to beg for food. Place them in abusive homes. Place them in orphanages where it's survival of the fittest, and you can call yourself lucky if you get one meal a day. Strip them of any sense of security they have ever had. No family. No home. No education. No hope for the future. 

What would you do to bring them back to 3 square meals a day, adequate health care, a safe, loving family and a future? 

How personally and emotionally charged would your journey become to get them home? 

Would it offend you if I came to your house for coffee and didn't ask you how your journey was going? 

Would it offend you if I didn't ask if there is any way I can help you bring your child home? 

Would it offend you if I declined your plea for help, or declined the opportunity to support your fundraising endeavours? 

Would it offend you if I not only openly failed to acknowledge the fact that you are simply trying to give your child a home, but treated it as if it were absolutely unnecessary and indulgent? 

Would it offend you if I asked why you would want to do this? 

Would it offend you if I asked you why you don't look for a different child in a different country... perhaps China?

Would it offend you if I told you that you shouldn't bother bringing your child home if you have to fundraise to do it - because obviously you cannot afford it? 

Imagine how your view of me would be?

Cold. 

Selfish.

Uncaring.

Now. I daresay that you think I'm being melodramatic, and this clearly is not the situation. Of course you would assist me if my child were to get kidnapped and be forced to live in such horrible conditions. Right? 

please.... Listen to me. 

This is my child. 

And this child is living in horrible conditions. 

This is how I feel. 

You don't have to understand it. 

If you care at all, you will take my word for it.  

This IS how I feel, and this is my journey to MY child. 

If you don't acknowledge it or support it - I will be deeply offended. I will never forget, not only the harsh words you said, but also the words you didn't say. These words and actions cut deeply. They are painful and they are ever lasting. Unfortunately, I already have too long a list of them carved out in my memory.  I fear they will never leave me.

I will try to forgive you and give you the benefit of the doubt. I will try to understand that you didn't realize the magnitude of your actions or lack of.  But here I am now... laying it all out in the open. Putting it out there in hopes that it will clear up any misunderstanding  you or I may have ever had... and in hopes that it will eliminate any in the future. 

Remember. 

I am putting every fiber of my being into 'giving an orphaned child a family'. 

Our family. 

Our child. 

I am not working towards going on some exotic cruise. 

I am not raising money to buy a hot air balloon. 

A child. 

An innocent child who needs a family and a future. 

It's that simple. 

If you would like to know how you can support your loved ones through the adoption process, please stay tuned for part 2, which I promise will be much more upbeat and positive!  

It was worth it all.

Today we were caught off guard with an adoption expense that we were not aware of and did not budget for. Today is a good day to remember that one day, it will be worth it all.



This is a great organization in Kenya, that is doing some great work. Check them out!

To Kenya With Love - Video - WXII The Triad

Unfortunately, I don't have much of an update. Our dossier still sits at Foreign Affairs. I was hoping that since they made a mistake and missed stamping some documents that 'fast track' would mean they would get to it in a day or two. At this point, it could take weeks for all we know.

I found a great News Clip on the Orphanage New Life Homes - where we would like to volunteer as a family when we are in Kenya. (Go ahead and get your fill of cute babies!!)

To Kenya With Love - Video - WXII The Triad

It is these ones we need to fight for...

How sad ... so very sad, and unfair is it that a beautiful nine month old baby has had such a horrific past that not only does she lack the will to even try to weight bare on her legs... but that the light has turned out in her eyes? Look at those eyes... These eyes bring me straight to tears. They tell a horrific story of abuse and neglect. These are the ones we need to pray for, fight for. I am so happy that baby Elizabeth has been rescued and I can only hope that the light returns to her eyes. Poor baby girl.

Please visit His Cherished Ones if you would like to learn more, or find out how you can help children like these.

From HCO - "And this is Elizabeth. Sweet Elizabeth has also been neglected during her few short months of life. Though she did have a mother to feed her and meet her basic needs, it is clear that she was missing so much. Her mother has been committed for neglect, after abandoning her a few weeks ago. Though an absolute beauty of a baby girl, Elizabeth is quite delayed in her development. Her muscles are extremely weak. Her poor little legs just flop about. At nine months old, she makes no effort whatsoever to weight bear on her legs. She is a very mellow baby who has obviously had little to no interaction or stimulation. She is perfectly content in any situation, indicating that there are no expectations as to what she wants or expects. She has obviously learned to self-sooth and be content in any environment. She is absolutely precious!

Please pray that little Elizabeth will gain strength in her body and life into her soul. Pray that she will quickly settle in and feel comfortable in her environment, and that she will progress developmentally. For whatever time we are blessed to have her in our home, may she soak up all the love that God has for her."

Harsh Reality (Warning Graphic photo)

I have to share a story. It's a story of one, but has happened to many more before, and will continue to happen unless something is done.

The story comes from the director of the Upinde Baby Centre in Mombasa. As quoted from Facebook:

Today I recieved news from a friend in Kibera that a baby was thrown away in the slums. It was asked whether Upinde would work with Kibera and of course, we said yes. Sadly, this is the baby he was referring to, a baby boy who died there from hypothermia (he simply got too cold waiting). Upinde has offered to network so cases like this can come here but there is more to be done. We want to set up a safe place for babies so we can reach them before they die. Keep an eye on the blog as we roll out our plans... www.tokenyaforever.com Rest in Peace sweet boy

I apologize for this photo. I shared it on my Facebook ... and constantly have to quickly scroll by it. However, I think it is important to help us better understand how tragic this situation is.

We don't know if the Mother intended for the baby to die, or if she hoped someone would find him. Perhaps the Father or another family member took him from the Mother and put him there? We just don't know. What we do know, is this happens all the time. babies are left in trash heaps like this, they are left tied up in plastic bags, thrown out moving vehicles and tossed down pit latrines.

The fundamental problem - is obviously the poverty. People cannot afford to feed and house themselves let alone another child. The other problem weighing heavily in this equation is the fact that it is illegal to abandon your child in Kenya. In turn, babies are abandoned in secret, where no one will bare witness. No safe drop boxes, nothing.

(What can be done about this? I don't really know. Some law changes would be helpful... More education etc... I look forward to learning more and find out what we can do to help.)

Seriously - I just find it shocking that no church or orphanage has just built a large wooden box, painted it red and put it in the center of Kibera's trash dump... or etc. (Since all of Kibera is essentially a trash dump) Upon seeing this ... it would be obvious, and it would be used. A volunteer could do a walk thru once a day. BUT, where do you put the babies then? And, I supposed this is why they haven't done it.

So don't be surprised if I start 'operation red box' while I'm in Kenya and come home with a dozen babies!

This child...

This child...

...was found here, "in the local dumspite (rubish tip) tied up in a sack. She was surrounded by dogs which thankfully alerted a village elder that she was there and he took her to the childrens department."

This child...

...and his twin sister...

...were actually thrown into a ditch from a moving vehicle!

This child...

...his parents, considering him a mistake, abandoned him. He was found still unwashed, naked, unfed and with his umbilical cored tied off with a piece of string at 3 days old.

And this child...

...was left to die in the bottom of a pit latrine (out house).



And sadly, these are the lucky ones. 

The remaining abandoned babies who's cries were never heard, will die cold, lonely and hungry. 

The ones that do survive, will have to contend with this...

And this is why we are so driven to help. Adopt. Sponsor. Volunteer.

Please help, hope, pray, give - in any way you can. These children need our help!

A call for help, for this beautiful boy.

Nothing breaks my heart more than the stories of the orphans in Eastern Europe. You've likely heard about it, and if so, you will recall children in orphanages left alone, hungry and unloved. Children who are so unstimulated, they rock, the bang their heads, they pull their hair, they rub patches of their skin until it bleeds - just for stimulation! You may have also heard the term 'laying room', or alternatively coined 'the dying room' where children are left in cribs, in the dark, sedated, and sometimes even strapped down. All day. All night. They don't get to come out unless it's to be changed or fed. Most of these children can't even stand. And if that isn't bad enough... once they turn 5/6, they are sent to die in a mental institution. And this is the epitome of hell.

The good news is, that many of children have been rescued and adopted... and most have amazingly flourished (check out my Amazing Mama's/ Amazing Children links)! Well who wouldn't really, outside the confines of a concentration camp (which is essentially what they're like!)?

A few days ago, I read about Valentin. A beautiful boy who was witnessed by an adopting family to be healthy, responsive and aware. This photo is when he was moved to a laying room a year ago.

This is Valentin a few months later...

And this is Valentin a year later.

Shocking, wouldn't you say?! Downright disturbing.

Thanks to a blog shout out to try and save this boys life, a lovely family stepped up to adopt him!! But it's not that easy, they have just completed 2 special needs adoptions in 2 years and can't afford the fees. This is URGENT! Valentin has just been scheduled to be transferred to a mental institution! We need to act fast to get this boy home.

Valentin is a Reece's Rainbow child and donations can be made through them on their website. Please consider making a donation, and sharing his story with others on your blog. Blogging has found him a family, and blogging can hopefully find the funding! Let's rally together to rescue Valentin!

To read more about Valentin or his new family, check out their website.

Haiti's orphans... a documentary worth watching!

Haiti, warm in my heart... is where our adoption journey started. It has been almost 19 months now since the devastation of the earthquake and the images of all those displaced orphans... planted a seed within us to adopt.

This documentary is really worth watching and certainly gives me mixed emotions. Wouldn't it be wonderful if families could afford to feed, clothe, and educate their children - and not be forced to give them up? Absolutely! And wouldn't it be wonderful if all the money that would be otherwise be designated to adoption... pay to keep these families together? Sure! But, sadly... it doesn't work that way. This is an extremely destitute country... with half of the population being children. No jobs, no health care, no assistance, no opportunity. These children are being abandoned, starved, dying of illnesses and being sold as servants. Look into these children's eyes and tell me that they don't want a better future! The poor boy crying as he has to watch the other boys go to school, when he is unable. Or the girl (Denise) who certainly has a preference for the orphanage than she does her own home! There is a very bleak future for these children in Haiti. A life in an orphanage is the best opportunity they have in Haiti, and I personally find it disturbing that the directors of the orphanage where Sonson resides think that a life in a orphanage is a better option than adoption. If it were me, or my own children... I would want them to have a family, and a life of opportunities. There are not enough orphanages to house the children in Haiti, so why not provide an orphan a loving family by way of adoption to make room for one more orphan... saving one more child's life?

I would bet you would be very hard pressed to find a Haitian (or other third world country) Adoptee who wishes they would have been left in their birth country to endure the daily struggle of hunger, disease, and lack of education.

The adoption freeze... it had to be done. I understand that. But clearly, there are paper ready, orphaned, abandoned children... let's get them out and give them the love and life they deserve! God bless God's Littlest Angels orphanage! (If you are interested, Dixie has her own blog.)

Unicef is very hard on adoption... only supporting children to remain in their birth country to the fate of which they were born in. I think there is a healthy balance of supporting families, and supporting adoption. Not all children have families obviously. By sponsoring a child in a third world country, you sponsor the entire family and enable them to stay together... this is important, and we personally sponsor 3 (one in Kenya!). By adopting, we are giving a child a family that they don't have.. or never will have if they are not adopted.

Video below:
http://www.cbc.ca/documentaries/doczone/video.html?ID=1742067139

Quotes for the Orphan...

Some of my favorite quotes:

I have come to realize more and more that the greatest disease and the greatest suffering is to be unwanted, unloved, uncared for, to be shunned by everybody, to be just nobody (to no one). 
Mother Teresa 

What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us. What we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.
Albert Pine

"If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one." -Mother Teresa

"I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples." -Mother Teresa

"I'd like to ask God why He lets poverty and injustice exist, why there are so many orphans and why He does nothing about it, but I am afraid He would ask me the same question." - Unknown

"As one person I cannot change the world, but I change the world of one person." - Paul Shane Spear

It’s easy to make a buck. It’s a lot tougher to make a difference.
Tom Brokaw

I hope you will judge yourselves not on your professional accomplishments alone, but also on how well you have addressed the world’s deepest inequities…on how well you treated people a world away who have nothing in common with you but your humanity.

Bill Gates

 It is not only for what we do that we are held responsible, but also for what we do not do. 

Moliere 

What is the use of living if it be not to strive for noble causes and to make this muddled world a better place for those who will live in it after we are gone?
- Winston Churchill

Life's most persistent and urgent question is: what are you doing for others?                                          - Martin Luther King Jr.

Accomplishment is when you use your extra strength to help someone else, rather than to get to the top first.

- Donald Ernest Mansell

If you are not poor enough to take charity, you are rich enough to give it.
- Unknown